Managing my comfort has become a large part of my daily life with the constant stress of having a father with stage 4 cancer. When cortisol levels are through the roof and everything feels so overwhelming I can’t even look up what somatic exercises are or how to do them. I resort to other methods to calm things down and bring more joy to my spaces.
The first one is creating an ambiance that enhances and matches the vibe of the mood I’m in. I first discovered ambient music with accompanying screensavers via YouTube earlier this year when I dove into the world of fantasy reading. On a whim I typed in the name of the book I was reading with the word ‘ambiance’ after it and I was in a world of delight to find that there are hundreds of uploads with creator’s graphic designs and animations that make it feel like you’re sitting in your favorite FMC’s castle or keep with a gentle rain storm tapping outside.
After months of exploring sunny cafes with jazz, twinkling star cities with ethereal music, 1940s vintage scapes with old radio songs playing in another room, I found how relaxing it is to truly create an aesthetic and grounding space through sight and sound. With or without a book, this is a great way to use multimedia as a de-stressor. Even throwing on a favorite movie as a quiet background white noise helps on particularly stressful days when my mind won’t quiet down (I usually throw on Disney’s “Luca”).
Second, for me, was lighting. Having a bright, main light is always utility and practical. But nothing compares to intentional lighting fixtures that don’t cast harsh shadows. Candles, ground-level mood lighting, small lamps, sconces and fairy lights. The less intense and cozier the better.
Next, making a warm drink like a coffee or tea can also go a long way in calming the space. A great book for escaping reality for an hour or so, soft blankets, a comfy sitting area…It’s all such a recipe for reducing stress, decompressing for the day and regulating your body back to safety. Finding time for a nap or falling asleep after this time is usually best for fully renewing my energy and leaning into that safe, calming comfort I’ve created for myself.
I tend to be alone when moving through these rituals. But, as always, the easy company of a loved one only enhances the environment if they happen to join in on the quiet time.
And finally, bringing fresh cut flowers or greens into my room always makes such a difference. The energy always lightens with living things around. I’ll water my plants and make small arrangements. Creating beauty in my space makes me feel like I’m caring for my surroundings and, therefore, myself.
Bailey Blog 
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